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Animatorials

These were originally from ANIMAL INTERNET
my defunct site of editorials written by animals. 

Please  don't click on this

Did I Just Hear You Call Me Lazy?

8/10/2012

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Picture
Written by Higgins (donkey)

I'm lazy? Is that what I heard you say? Yeah well, I don't see YOU walking up and down the Grand Canyon twice a week. Do me a favor, would ya? Grab that knapsack over there and take it up that mountain for me. Oh, and make sure they tie it on real loose so that the pots and pans rattle the whole way up. What's was that? Yeah, I didn't think you'd want to.

I'm stubborn too, right? That's the stereotype, isn't it? Lazy and stubborn. Let me tell you why I'm stubborn. Because I'm smarter than you. That's right, I said it. I've walked these damn trails a thousand times. Just cause you're too inexperienced to recognize a trial not worth following doesn't mean I should have to go that way also, Mr. I'm So Stupid I Pack Heavy Canned Foods On A Backpacking Trip.

You're mistaking laziness for economy of motion. I move slow. You pegged me. You're SO smart. I'm saving my energy. You ever think of that? What happens when they need someone to haul some Top Secret Anti-Alien Missile Device to the top of the mountain to save the world before it's destroyed? Who are they gonna turn to? I'll tell you who - the smart animal who's been conserving his energy.

Go ahead and call me names but I'll be the one saving the planet, not you. Who'll be the ass then? Huh? Who?

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