Billiamville
  • Home
  • About
  • Books
  • Animatorials
  • Video
  • Pics
  • Contact

Animatorials

These were originally from ANIMAL INTERNET
my defunct site of editorials written by animals. 

Please  don't click on this

So I Hear You Want To Join The Circus

8/10/2012

0 Comments

 
Picture
written by Mr. Hugo (elephant)

So I hear you wanna join the circus, huh kid? 

Let me give you some advice - donʼt. Life in under the Big Top ainʼt all fresh hay and peanuts.I used to be like you - bright-eyed, full of hope. I too listened when the circus recruiters came and talked about waking up each day in a new town and nights spent in front of cheering crowds. What the recruiters forget to mention are the 23 hours between shows.Itʼs lonely, for starters. Youʼre on the road nine months a year. 

Think youʼre gonna meet some great gal at a local zoo? One willing to drop everything and follow you cross-country as a circus groupie? Oh, please! Let me tell you how your nights are gonna be spent - alone, in the mess tent playing cards with me, some midgets and the union drivers.And by the way? The tents stink. Ever see a washing machine big enough to hold a circus tent?-- Oh Hell, why am I even wasting my breath? Youʼre gonna do what you want. Mark my words though, five years from now youʼre gonna be standing backstage before showtime, the guy coming up behind you with the stick and youʼre gonna think, I shouldʼve listened to the old geezer. I shouldʼve never joined the circus. 

But by then itʼll be too late. Check out Monster.com. See any job offerings for middle-aged elephants?The circus is no life, kid. Once youʼre in it, you never get out. Itʼs like porn. There. I said my peace. 

Now get outta here and leave me alone.

0 Comments

    RSS Feed

     

    All
    Angry
    Apple
    Bird
    Bull
    Bully
    Butlers
    Camping
    Cancer
    Cat
    Cells
    Chicken
    Circus
    Damage
    Dating
    Dear
    Diary
    Diet
    Disease
    Divorce
    Dog
    Dove
    Drugs
    Eagle
    Elephant
    Family
    Fat
    Fish
    Food
    Fox
    Grateful
    Helmsley
    Holidays
    Hunting
    Iphone
    Jobs
    Letter
    Magic
    Marriage
    Medicine
    Mice
    Mobile
    Music
    Obama
    Owl
    Penquin
    Philosophy
    Politics
    Quit
    Race
    Racing
    Religion
    Restaurants
    Rich
    Sea Monkey
    Servants
    Sex
    Sharks
    Skunk
    Sports
    Stubborn
    Supernatural
    Television
    Trash
    Travel
    Turkey
    Turtle
    Walrus
    Weight
    Zebra

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.